Why You Need a Self-Love List and How to Make One
It can be hard to love yourself, we know. That's why we're so passionate about sharing this post on what a self-love list is, why you need one, and how to make one.
Maybe you feel like you have to put everyone else’s needs before your own and self-love feels selfish. Maybe you’ve got wounds from past experiences that make you feel unloveable. Maybe you never feel good enough, so you don’t allow yourself the love you deserve.
Does any of this sound true for you? There are so many reasons that self-love is hard, and it’s different for everyone. I want to assure you that you’re not alone. Regardless of how much I write about self-love and intentional living, it takes daily effort to love myself.
Regardless of how hard it can be to love ourselves, we deserve more growth, joy, and meaning in our lives.
What is A Self-Love List?
A self-love list is exactly what it sounds like: it’s a list of things that you love about yourself. Similar to a gratitude list, it’s a collection of everything you love about yourself and a list that you can continue to add to overtime.
Self-love lists include your accomplishments, favorite traits about yourself, obstacles you’ve overcome, and affirmations that remind you how to love yourself.
The purpose of a self-love list is to create a collection of everything you love about yourself so that you can use these things as reminders to practice self-love every day.
Why You Need a Self-Love List
We’ve already established that it’s hard to love yourself. But even when you get better at self-love, it’s hard to remember to love yourself.
Our lives are usually hectic so self-love doesn’t usually get prioritized. We are constantly bombarded with social media and news that makes self-love even harder. And on top of all that, we’ve got this leftover survival tactic called the negativity bias that basically wires our brain to focus on negative things.
Having a list of everything you love about yourself will allow you to create a daily self-love practice. This daily practice will counteract all of the negativity and serve as a constant reminder that you’re amazing.
If you struggle with self-love and remembering to practice self-love, then you need a self-love list.
You can use your self-love list in a few ways.
You can write down one thing from your list in your planner every day. For example, if you’re working on a new project, write down some things you’ve accomplished to remind yourself that you can do awesome things.
You can also choose to keep your self-love list handy and pull it out when you’re in need of love.
Or, jot down a few things you love about yourself at the end of the day, using your self-love list as a reference point.
How To Make a Self-Love List
Creating a self-love list is truly as simple as writing down everything you love about yourself. You can create the list in a notebook, sheet of paper, or somewhere on your computer or phone.
Make your list an ongoing list. It can be surprisingly hard to remember the things you love about yourself. Start with just one idea, then add to your list every time you think of something new.
If you’re struggling to think of things you love about yourself, try thinking about the things you love about other people. How could you love yourself for these qualities as well? You can also recruit a friend or family member and ask them what they love about you. How can you love yourself in the ways you are loved by others?
Use the ideas below to start creating your own self-love list!
7 Things To Include In Your Self-Love List
What have you achieved? Think about projects you’ve completed or goals you’ve reached. These can be in any area of your life: career, physical health, mental health, education, etc. Knowing that you can achieve things is a helpful reminder when you’re working toward goals.
2. Ways You’ve Helped Others
Sometimes, I feel selfish and I forget that I’m a kind person. I love including ways I’ve helped others on my self-love list to remind me that I am good and compassionate, and also to inspire me to keep helping others.
How have you helped others? Do you volunteer regularly? Are you completely and fully present with your friends? Do you do the best you can to provide for your family? Does your work benefit the lives of others? You probably help people in more ways than you think!
3. Obstacles You’ve Overcome
Think about adversity you’ve overcome or how you’ve succeeded despite the opinion of others. Think about tough times you’ve got through like losing a loved one or a job. Think about the physical or mental struggles you’ve had to overcome to continue to grow as a person.
If you’re facing obstacles in your life, it can be helpful to remember that you’ve already overcome so much.
4. Ways You’ve Grown
How have you already grown over the course of your life? Life is always changing, so it’s inevitable that you’ve already experienced growth!
5. Personality Traits
What are some of your favorite things about yourself?
Personally, I love that I can always love the bright side of any situation. I love that I can piece together information in creative ways. I love that I love trying new things. I love that I believe in kindness.
We are all so unique and amazing, and there’s so much to love about each of us.
6. Physical Traits
Finding physical traits that you love about yourself can be a sore spot for many people. But I encourage you to try. The more you feel shame or self-hate toward your body, the more important it is to practice loving it. With practice, everything gets easier.
If you have a hard time loving your physical appearance, try starting by loving the way your body provides for you.
Finally, include some affirmations in your self-love list.
For your list, choose affirmations that are inherently true but hard to believe (ex. I am enough). The idea is to use these affirmations as reminders to affirm to yourself that you’re amazing.
Here are some ideas to get you started:
- I am resilient
- I am brave
- I am strong
- I am lovable
- I am enough
- I am capable
- I am worthy
- I am smart
- I am amazing
- I am beautiful
We hope this helps you create your own self-love list and, in turn, helps you love yourself a little more.
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